I took some Tylenol and set my alarm to get up twice through the night to check my temperature and thankfully my fever went down. I woke up feeling good, just weak from only having water yesterday, so it seems it was just a virus, thank the Lord.
Without a word of complaint, my superhero husband stepped in and took over like he has done countless time over this past year. He got the kids ready for school and walked them down. He went to the office to try to make us a little money. He was back in time to do school pickup and homework and multiple soccer practice runs and bedtime. Shaun pulled up a chair to our bed and administered my antibiotics. And then I put him in the difficult position to decide what we were going to do. I lean on him heavy. Sometimes (usually) my brain doesn't function well enough to make choices and I look to Shaun to just tell me what to do, leaving him in a position to make the necessary, hard calls on our next course of action. I'm so grateful for his strong, broad shoulders.
Today I am weary and worn. I don't understand. In real life, I am such a simple, drama-free person, so its been hard to become Complication Girl in this cancer world. My once strong, healthy body that all my life I've taken meticulous care of is not cooperating.
If you believe that somehow God could change your circumstances, but that God has chosen not to, you have the option to receive whatever it is you are dealing with as a gift with a purpose and a promise. If you believe that God could if he would change your circumstances and you've prayed and prayed and prayed but it looks like God is not going to act on your behalf the way you want God to act, you have the option to change your attitude and your perspective about whatever it is you are facing. And you have the option to receive it as a gift with a purpose and a promise. The purpose is yet to be made known; the promise is "My GRACE is sufficient for you". ~Andy Stanley
But He has said to me, [My lovingkindness and My mercy are more than enough—always available—regardless of the situation]; [My] [and is completed and shows itself most effectively] [your] Therefore, I will all the more gladly boast in my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ [may completely enfold me and] may dwell in me. 2 Corinthians 12:9
Though this journey can get lonely, I am reminded daily, in multiple ways, that I am not alone. Its such an encouragement, and I thank you for that.
Even though its not Shaun's favorite, he went out of his way to bring me the coffee I like.
My expectations of hospital food are pretty low because there are all sorts of challenges involved, but the food at our local hospital was simply not edible. Fake, processed, nasty. If I ate those meals three times a day, I would be a more regular customer. Shaun smuggled in some real food and I was touched that he would cut up an avocado (first time!) Later, Avery secretly told me that he did it all wrong. :)
In addition to the signs outside my door that said BEWARE...infections! the nurses also posted a sign on my door that said Do Not Disturb while I was conducting interviews on Monday and Tuesday. They were great about it and so was my boss (in case you're wondering, he's not a jerk, I was just insistent to stay involved as long as he was ok with the questionable professionalism of it all, what with the loud speaker going off every so often to get assistance for someone needing to go to the bathroom).
My nieces and nephews have been so sweet even though most of them (mercifully) are too young to understand. They literally have the faith of a child and have spent countless hours praying for me. They also pick me flowers and sing me songs and make signs.
Late Tuesday afternoon this crew sprung me out of the hospital. On our walk home (its actually a mile not 1/2) we made another attempt at the family selfie. How'd we do?? :)
I brought home these shower caps for the girls to try out. It comes in a warm package with shampoo and conditioner in it. You massage your head for a few minutes and, wha-la, clean hair with no rinsing.
The girls are learning to do quick errands for me, as I'm avoiding public places. This day Avery was mailing out my CT Scan disk for the surgeon.
Love is spoken in many ways.
There were a few questions about my antibiotics. I'm on two. One is pills three times a day, the other is delivered once a day through my port, which stays accessed, meaning the needle stays in 24/7. Shaun is every nurse's best friend as he's capable of and willing to do so much of my care.